Seeing in Color

Years ago, after spending a long time trying different approaches to healing, I met a Somatic Experiencing practitioner.

A few weeks into the work, something changed.

The best way I can describe it is this:

I felt like I had gone from seeing in black and white to seeing in color.

At the time, I couldn't fully explain what was different.

I only knew that my world suddenly felt larger.

More vivid.

More alive.

One of the first things I remember doing in those sessions was looking around the room and noticing what my eyes were naturally drawn toward.

A picture.

An object.

A color.

Something pleasant.

Then I would pause and notice what happened inside me.

My shoulders would soften.

My breathing would deepen.

My body would settle.

The experience was simple.

And yet it changed the way I understood myself.

Before then, I had spent much of my life paying attention to what was wrong, what was missing, or what needed fixing.

This work invited me to pay attention to what was already supporting me.

To what felt steady.

What felt alive.

What felt good.

Looking back, that shift may have been the most important lesson of all.

Not learning how to fix myself.

Learning how to notice myself.