No Inappropriate Whale Talk

A while back, my husband and I found ourselves in a rut.

We had both gone through major work transitions.

The result was that we spent most of our time talking about work.

Then recovering from talking about work.

Then watching television because we were tired from talking about work.

One day, we finally named it.

We had become coworkers who happened to live in the same house.

So we decided to do something about it.

The next day, we went on a date to a cat café.

If you've never been to a cat café, imagine drinking coffee while thirty cats roam around the room looking for laps to occupy.

I immediately befriended a tiny one-eyed tortoiseshell cat who followed me everywhere.

My husband found a cat he called Belle.

At some point, we looked around and realized we were both grinning like children.

Nothing dramatic had changed.

We had simply interrupted the pattern.

Later, we tackled the second problem: talking about work all the time.

We borrowed a phrase from Extraordinary Attorney Woo, a show we both enjoyed.

On the show, the main character is obsessed with whales.

Someone eventually reminds her:

"No inappropriate whale talk."

The phrase became ours.

Whenever one of us starts drifting into an endless work monologue, the other can simply say:

"No inappropriate whale talk."

We still talk about work.

We just don't live there.

Looking back, I don't think the cat café fixed anything.

The phrase didn't either.

What helped was noticing we were stuck and being willing to change the conversation.

Sometimes that's all a rut needs.